The Little Things

It's the little things in life that can make your day, open your eyes to something new, cause you to slow down and see the world from a fresh perspective. Little things can overwhelm us if we let them, or we can let them go and put them in Someone else's much more capable hands. Oh, how the little things affect us. Right now I'm enjoying my little one snuggled up on my chest (thank you to whoever invented the Moby wrap!), the sound of her breathing so close to me. I'm feeling accomplished after showering and getting dressed before 11 am, having a second load of laundry in the washer and a bathed, sweet-smelling, fuzzy-haired baby. I'm thankful for my husband's sweet text message this morning that simply said, "Love you sooo much! We have the perfect little family :)". And I'm super thankful that he just walked in the door from an apparently short day at work! What a wonderful little (huge, really!) surprise! Woohoo!

Three Weeks Old!

Natalie is three weeks old today! It makes me sad to think she's that old already. Time really has flown by. Since my last post, I feel a lot closer to my normal, less-hormonal self. She's still not sleeping the best at night, which translates into lots of sleeping on the couch for me so that Alex gets enough rest for work. I miss my bed and my husband, but this too shall pass. A lot of the things that were getting me down are not an issue anymore or I've finally gotten over them and have chosen not to worry about them (nursing!). I survived Alex's first day back to work without shedding a tear (probably because I was too frustrated about being awake with Natalie for a three hour stretch during the night and just wanted to SLEEP!) and today I spent the day entirely on my own with the baby, a first since she's been born. It did get a little lonely, but a few phone calls to chat with people helped with that. It's hard having an infant in the winter because I feel like I don't want to run all over town with her out in the cold weather (or rainy weather, as was the case today) and then cabin fever sets in. Thankfully, by the time I'm awake and ready for the day, there's only a few hours until Alex gets home from work. Lots of sleeping in has been happening here because of all the mid-night feedings and "parties" this little girl likes to throw. I can't wait til she decides to give that up! Hopefully my mom or mother-in-law with come visit tomorrow and keep us company for a while. Almost everyone I know has been or is sick with sinus stuff and can't be around us. Well, little one is hollering, so I've got to go!! Motherhood calls!

Life As A New Mom

Natalie is two and a half weeks old and I feel like my world has been turned upside down. Hormones, baby blues, sleep deprivation, breast-feeding complications have all contributed to the chaos that is now my life. I know that things will get better as we all adjust to this new lifestyle, but it has been harder than I ever imagined. We were so blessed for Alex to be able to stay home with us this long, but he returns to work tomorrow and I'm not looking forward to it. I like having his company during the day and love being together as a family. We're both learning how to parent together and can bounce ideas off one another whenever something comes up. Like how we're going to get our sweet baby girl to sleep at night instead of staying up to party.

It was only by God's grace that I survived 21 hours of natural childbirth and it will only be by God's grace that I get through this transition and the rest of my life as a mom. I am so grateful for the help of my husband, parents and in-laws who have spent countless hours at our house cleaning, cuddling the baby, holding me while I cry, and just being wonderful help. I am also so grateful for all our friends and church family that have brought us food for the past two weeks. I couldn't even begin to think about grocery shopping much less planning and cooking dinner until now.

I always thought I'd be a natural at motherhood, but I'm quickly discovering how much I have to learn. I'm sure I'll be learning things daily from now until forever, but that's ok as long as God gives me the wisdom I've so desperately been praying for. He is faithful and with His help we'll be able to endure sleepless nights, exhausting days and everything in between.