Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Pregnancy with Baby G#3

In just under two weeks, we will find out the gender of little baby G#3. It is a lot easier said than done to not get your hopes up one way or the other, but I am trying my best to stay neutral. I will say though that my pregnancy symptoms have been very different this time than they were with both the girls. My sense of smell has been more keen than ever before, my skin has been much clearer than it was with the girls, there has been no tenderness in my chest, I haven't gotten sick at all, but the constant nausea is really getting old. I mean, I'm into my second trimester now and there is no sign of it going away. Those stick out to me as the biggest differences.

At 15 weeks, I feel huge. Not huge and uncomfortable, just bigger than I think I should be at this far along. At my first prenatal appointment, which was at 12 weeks, my doctor said I felt bigger than 12 weeks and ordered an ultrasound to check things out. He said I could come back the following week or two or wait until my next visit in four weeks for the ultrasound since I live 45 minutes away. Since we had already planned to do a gender ultrasound at 16 weeks, I figured I'd just wait until my next appointment and do it all at once. But he has me all worried about twins! Why else would he break his "rule" of not doing an ultrasound before 20 weeks? Surely it is no big deal if a woman measures ahead during her third pregnancy, right? I mean, my uterus knows a thing or two about stretching out at this point and my abdominal muscles are, well, not toned, and may never be again. But surely if he really suspected twins, he wouldn't have me wait four more weeks to find out!? We shall have all those answers soon!

Natalie wants a brother AND a sister, and no matter how you try to explain that there is probably only one baby in there, she still says she wants both and then suggests names like "Sprinkle" (because a friend and I were discussing the concept of  "sprinkles" instead of baby showers) or whatever name Alex says is his favorite at the time. Julia, of course, has no clue what is going on and is more than content to try and climb all over my belly for play time or cuddles as much as her little heart desires. I have realized that it is a wonderful thing that she is so petite compared to Natalie because it would be so much harder to be pregnant with her being so young if she were much heavier. Natalie was Julia's size at just 9 months old!

I realized today after I had gotten the girls loaded into the car and then had to go back into the house to retrieve my keys that despite it being a lot of work to go anywhere with two kids, I have no intention of getting all worked up about how much harder it will be to leave the house with three littles in tow. I don't plan to squeeze in as many outings as I can with just the two of them while I still can, while it is still "easy". I'm just going to live life and enjoy whatever comes and not worry about what I cannot change. If we make it to the park every week for some special play time this summer, then great. If not, then we saved the gas and hopefully had just as much fun playing in the backyard. I suppose maybe I should savor the ability to grocery shop pretty much whenever I want to because I can still take both kids with me and have room in the cart for all our purchases because I don't foresee being able to stay sane while attempting to grocery shop with 3 kids under 4. My grocery shopping habits are pretty much guaranteed to change once the baby is born in order to preserve my sanity and energy.

I know I have done a terrible job at being fully present in the moment and I desperately want to get better about that. Maybe that can be a "pregnancy resolution". I just made that up, but it works. Be present because these years are going to fly by and I don't want to look back with regret. I want to remember as many of the details of my kids' childhood as I can. I only have a few more months with just my two girls and I don't want to forget what that was like. What they were like. Right now, they get excited at the simplest things and live life with such enthusiasm. I want that to rub off on me. What a wonderful way to live!